THE SEVEN PRINCIPLES

Here we are at the end of another year.  2010, where have you gone?  Why is it that life seems to fly by lately?  Before I know it my kids will be off to college.  Having twins will compact my time as a parent.  Whereas, parents with children that are different ages will still have years of parenting left once the first one is off to college (or otherwise out of the house,) we twin parents (and one child households) are done once that happens.  The thought saddens me really. 

"Gratitude"

This year Thanksgiving came pretty close to being perfect.  The meal itself could have been better.  The apple crumb pie I made was a failure, my peach cobbler was a little too soggy in the middle, the collard greens were missing, but despite all of this, the day was still just about perfect.  My mother and her life partner, Kevin, made the almost six hour drive down to New York City to join us.  For as long as I can remember, my mom has wanted to see the Thanksgiving Day Parade.  So for years I have invited her, along with the rest of my family, to Brooklyn for Thanksgiving.  Being the only child of my mother’s who does not reside in Rochester, I was happily surprised this year when my mom actually said yes.  Yes, she would be coming to Brooklyn for Thanksgiving.    

"Meeting Sahm-chone"

Every Sunday, my mother cooks a huge meal and my siblings and their families gather at her house to enjoy it.  Since I live more than a five hour drive away, it is rare that we get to partake in the Sunday Family Meal.  Even without my family of four present though, this makes a weekly dinner at my mom’s house with about 20 people give or take, depending on schedules.  Usually the dinner is all-American with Italian leanings since my family is Italian and Irish-American.  (I make a mean eggplant parmigiana and lasagne myself.)  I am in love with the entire concept of this Sunday Family Meal.  And it has always been a dream to have my own weekly family meals for my family and friends, as well.

On a recent Sunday, I hosted just such a Family Meal at our place in Brooklyn.  Instead of the typical menu consisting of something Italian or Southern though, there was bulgoki, man doo, jap chae, dduk boki and some ban chan.  Mind you, just about the whole meal was ordered in since there are very few Korean dishes that I know how to make.  However, because I am culturally American, I just had to make a dessert, so there was homemade peach raspberry cobbler along with mochi bought in K-town.  (And don’t let anyone ever tell you that Korean people don’t like cobbler because that sucker was g-o-n-e!)

"Heart and Seoul: A Korean Adopted Woman's Perspective"

I have been inspired, once more, to re-learn my native tongue.  Having been three years old when I was adopted, I believe that somewhere in my subconscious mind, I am able to speak Korean.  My birth language is there, hidden, deep in the recesses of my brain.  How I wish that I could simply jolt the knowledge forward - and instantly be able to communicate, once again, with my Omma and the rest of my Korean family.  

The urge to re-learn Korean has come and gone over the years.  I even took a class on 32nd Street once.  Learning the Korean alphabet was pretty easy-peasy but the rest of it, eh, not so much.  (And how frustrating that my native tongue is so difficult for me to re-learn!  Yet another loss in trans-national adoption.)  Since meeting my Korean mother and siblings in 2004 re-learning my mother tongue is something I promised myself I would, someday, do.  Soon after my return from Korea when some of the intense emotions experienced during the trip had settled a bit, the promise to myself to learn to speak Korean was put on my “life’s-to-do-list” and promptly ignored.